Lily four months...

.....well almost:) Next week but I wanted to go ahead and post these cute pictures. What a cute little four month old!! I can't wait to go get her numbers at the Dr. because I'm sure she had grown length wise. She is a lot longer I think. Anyway she is precious like I said before. She loves her daddy and loves to smile and laugh when she is happy. And pucker that lower lip and cry when she isn't so happy. She has THE BEST pucker, way better than Henry's. She is such a girl!!

You know this past weekend was just awful. I don't want to gloss over those terrible days, cause hey, we have them all. I just never have the drive to blog when I feel like that. But for reality's sake I will say they were awful. I've been a little sick since last Sunday night. I won't go into gross details but it hasn't been fun. When I wake up from not sleeping I have no energy and then by the end of the day I am in negative energy:( So I just feel like such a slacker mom because I don't even have the drive to interact with the kids like I should and I love to do that!! Well on top of all that.... well this is probably wayyyyyy too much info so stop reading if a little personal information is not needed.
BUT....
ever since about the time I started feeling sick I have also been soooo moody. I mean really hormonal. So much even that I went out and bought a pregnancy test just sure that it was going to say positive, don't worry, no positive:) ( and then I found myself actually disappointed, but that's a different post entirely)
But anyway I went on to take my disappointment out on the pack in play that I was trying to set up for some friends that were coming over. (Love you Blair) And when I got really mad I took it out on my poor husband who was trying to help me. Poor Kyle. So I've just been nutty. So last night, while I was "sleeping" I got a visit from a friend that I haven't seen in at least two years!! So THAT'S WHY!! I have been feeling crazy, not hungry for anything but soda and chocolate, and just really feeling down in the dumps. I have forgotten how much all that sucks!!! So I'm not glad about that but I am glad there is a reason. Because I was going to go to a psychiatrist if I didn't figure something out:) And on top of all that, those days that I just felt awful, physically and mentally, Kyle was held up at work and didn't get home until after seven both nights. So of course I said I wasn't mad at him (and I really wasn't) but then preceded to pick little fights all night. Oh, what a disaster of a week. There it is, the reality that there are days that just don't work out.
But this is a new weekend and I'm praying the next days will be great. I'm convinced when you are low and vulnerable like that, the devil knows it and uses those times to really whisper things to you. So I'm going to fight back and change things. :)
Love you all sooo much!! And don't worry, I'm not feeling mean anymore. lol

Sweet girl, growing up sooo fast!!